What To Do if You've Relapsed
Relapse can feel discouraging, but it does NOT mean you've failed.
One of the biggest misconceptions about recovery is that a relapse erases all of the progress you've made. In reality, Substance Use Disorder (SUD) is a chronic medical condition, much like diabetes, asthma, or high blood pressure. Just as symptoms of other chronic illnesses can return and require adjustments to treatment, a relapse can signal that it's time to reassess your recovery plan and strengthen your support system.
For almost everyone, recovery includes setbacks. What matters most is how you respond to and learn from setbacks to avoid making the same mistakes in the future.
Relapse is Information, Not Failure
A relapse often indicates that something in your recovery plan needs attention.
Maybe stress has increased. Perhaps you've experienced a major life change, stopped attending support meetings, or found yourself spending less time with people who encourage your recovery. Instead of viewing a relapse as the end of your journey or a moral failure (it’s not!), think of it as valuable information that can help you identify what support you need moving forward.
On that note, here is a step-by-step guide for how to handle a relapse with curiosity and self-compassion:
What To Do After a Relapse
1. Take a Deep Breath and Practice Self-Compassion
Feelings of shame, guilt, and disappointment are common after a relapse. While these emotions are understandable, they can also make it harder to seek help.
Remember that relapsing does not define you. It does not erase your worth, your progress, or your ability to recover. It is not something to hide or be shameful of. Instead, speak (or think) to yourself with the same compassion you would offer a friend in the same situation.
Related: Why Guilt and Shame are Toxic
2. Reach Out for Support Immediately
Community supports recovery, just as much as isolation supports continued use.
Contact someone you trust, tell them what happened, and ask for advice or share your plan for getting back on track.
You might reach out to:
A sponsor
Your therapist or counselor
Someone from your peer support group
A supportive family member or friend
Your treatment provider
The sooner you reconnect with your support network, the easier it will be to regain your footing.
Related: Local Therapists, Counselors, Peer Support Groups and More
3. Be Curious About What Happened
Rather than judging yourself, become curious about what led you to relapse.
Ask yourself:
What happened before I drank or used?
Was I experiencing increased stress?
Was I feeling lonely, anxious, or overwhelmed?
Did I stop using the coping skills that were helping me?
Were there people, places, or situations that triggered me?
Did I stop interacting with my support system?
Understanding the circumstances surrounding a relapse can help you prevent similar situations in the future.
Related: Preventing Relapse: 9 Common Warning Signs
4. Reevaluate Your Recovery Plan
Recovery needs change over time, and your treatment plan should change with them.
Depending on your circumstances, it may be helpful to:
Increase or return to counseling or therapy
Increase the frequency of support meetings
Reconnect with a sponsor or peer support group
Consider medication if you and your physician find it appropriate (especially if you’re experiencing Post Acute Withdrawal Syndrome)
Explore additional services, such as case management or Equine-Assisted Learning or Therapy
Build new coping strategies for stress and emotional challenges
5. Focus on Doing One Recovery-Supportive Action Today
Based on what you’ve learned from numbers 3 and 4 above, what is one thing you can do today to help get back on track with your recovery journey? Can you attend a meeting, schedule an appointment with a therapist or counselor, or engage in a stress-relieving activity?
Remake your commitment to not use for the rest of the day, throw out or otherwise destroy any remaining substances in your house, and commend yourself for choosing to move forward in your recovery journey.
Small steps create lasting change. And a few bumps along the road don’t have to derail your sobriety long-term, or define you in any way. What defines you is your bravery to try again, your commitment to becoming your best self, and your curiosity and dedication to learning from your mistakes and adapting your approach. Every experience, negative and positive, can become an opportunity to strengthen your recovery and better understand what helps you thrive.
We're Here to Support You Wherever You Are on Your Journey
If you or someone you love has experienced a relapse or is looking for recovery support, we’re here to help.
We offer compassionate, judgment-free support to help individuals and families manage withdrawal symptoms, access local resources, develop personalized recovery plans, and maintain long-term recovery.
Written by Liz Haas, Recovery Resources Digital Marketing & Outreach Specialist
